This idea of a one-word theme for the year was a fairly new concept for me last year. I took the challenge from a couple people to come up with my word for 2014, and I felt like my word for last year was “vulnerability”. I obviously had no clue what 2014 held in store for me, but I was sticking to that word. In my mind’s eye I could envision learning how to be more appropriately vulnerable with my heart in sharing with friends and acquaintances, I had no clue that I would open myself up for as much pain and suffering and joy and love and redemption as I would experience.
I went into 2014 thinking that I was supposed to learn how to share and what to share with others in terms of my emotional experience. And I know that anytime we share heart-issues with another there is a possibility for it to be received well and for it to blow up in our faces. Keep in mind, to be vulnerable means to open ourselves up for the possibility of being wounded. I knew that cognitively and expected that my heart could get bruised, but what I didn’t expect was the severity and frequency with which it was crushed and by such an array of sources!
I was severely betrayed by death. I was painfully betrayed by one of my closest friends. I was ignorantly betrayed by medical professionals. And worst of all, I was frequently and harshly betrayed by my own body!
At the same time, my openness to vulnerability afforded me countless opportunities for joy and delight. Because in addition to opening ourselves up to be wounded, vulnerability also opens us up to be more known and to experience more joy, beauty, and love than we ever though possible!
I opened myself up to experience the love and companionship of many new and very dear friends in 2014. I witnessed and celebrated an intimate exchange of vows between two people I’ve come to cherish this past year. I was invited to share my story for an amazing film project–the process of which was insurmountably cathartic and fulfilling. And I was afforded the opportunity to mend a relationship that had been strained for years.
I experienced waves of life and death in 2014, all in the name of vulnerability.
This year I decided to try this whole “one word” thing again. But this time I set out specifically seeking God and asking him what my one word should be–or better put, what his word is for me this year.
After a few days of prayer, Scripture reading, and soul searching, I believe I have been given my word for 2015:
The sense that I have is that God is going to do amazing healing in and through me in 2015. What this looks like in practicalities, I do not know.
I hope it means my body will know more healing than it has in a long time. I also hope it means that I will experience healing in my emotional life and in my relationships. And lastly, I hope it means that I will see tremendous healing in the lives of those individuals with whom I work as a psychologist.
But maybe it means none of those things.
God has a way of surprising us with how he works in and through our lives as we give him access to each area. So, I’m looking forward to seeing just how he intends to work out my one-word theme of healing in 2015. It’s sure to be a rollercoaster ride! Will you join me?
Let’s do this! And keep on keeping on…
In Christ’s love and mine…